“Ain’t got no more tears left to cry…
I’m loving, I’m living. I’m picking it up.”
Besides being THE obvious bop of 2018, Ariana Grande’s resiliency anthem, No more tears left to cry, shared a story of tragedy and the capacity we possess to heal. While Ms. Grande wrote a song that undoubtedly helped her through a difficult time in her life, cultivating resiliency in our everyday life goes beyond one song. In fact, resiliency is a painstaking process of scaffolding, persistence, falling, and growth. The following 5 tips are not easy, they are but a process of rediscovering your strength: inch-by-inch, move-by-move, and action-by-action.
Embrace the Dragonfly: Embrace Change
In many cultures, the dragonfly symbolizes change, adaptability, transformation, and the start of something new. Allowing yourself to accept that change is a part of life that moves us forward can help you reconcile that even the scariest of changes just might reveal new joys.
Shit happens. You’ve got this!
We’ve all experienced crises in our lives that feel insurmountable. How did you get through that disappointment? How did you rise to the occasion? How did you discover that you were stronger than you realized? Remember that you are a goddess, you are a champion, you are a warrior. You CAN do this! You’ve got the experience that will help prepare you for this new challenge. It might not take you the whole way to the finish line, but it will set you up for success as you regroup and strategize onward.
Friends: The official unofficial “therapist”
Who is the Gayle to your Oprah? The Rose Nylund to your Dorothy Zbornak? The Joey Tribbiani to your Chandler Bing? Being able to lean on your friends or social network in times of crisis is vital to your resiliency development. Friends (the good ones) remind you of who you are, what you’ve overcome, and how much of a badass you are when times get rough. Special shout out to those friends who know how to artfully slap you upset the head when you need to be kind to yourself. Those are the best, and perhaps, the most important friends. Remember that it’s okay to ask for or let others help.
Goals for now. Goals for later
When our resiliency is tested, we can often feel defeated, on shaky ground, and powerless. Setting realistic goals for immediate life (I will go to the gym tomorrow. I will let my friends take me out this weekend to cheer me up. I will clean my house.) can be an important part of your healing process. Moreover, setting goals for the coming future can help you focus on something attainable and ultimately remind you that you are capable and in control of different aspects of your life.
Be Kind (to yourself), Rewind
Why are we our worst critics? This trait of the human condition can be so annoying, lead to increased sadness, and ultimately prevent us from healing. While it is important to self-reflect and own our mistakes, it is equally important to remind ourselves that we are human and sometimes humans make silly decisions based on our emotions, whether we can see them as silly or not. Remember– the frustration we have with our past selves can help us become better people today and tomorrow.
If you’re searching for more accountability in your resiliency development or enjoy using Ariana Grande quotes during therapy, let’s talk. Send me a text or call today and let’s put your mental health first, together.
Visit my website to find out more about the type of therapy I do in Fort Collins and online in Colorado at www.axiscounseling.com
Adam-Jon Aparicio, LPC
970-239-1983
Axis Counseling, PLLC
WHERE WELLNESS MEETS ACTION
